Thursday, July 27, 2006

AAARRRGGGHHH!!!

Pet Peeve #1 -- People who don't knock on the bathroom door before trying to open it. Honestly peeps, when I'm sitting there making #2, I'd appreciate a little privacy. Don't come barging in on me while I'm taking care of business. It's called common courtesy and I suggest you get some.

Pet Peeve #2 -- Cops who don't obey traffic rules. Practice what you preach Officer Krupke, and don't you dare try to give me another ticket for "reckless driving" or "failure to yield." And don't bother coming after me just because you're a little short of your monthly quota. Krispy Kreme is cheap, so go sit down and enjoy your coffee and donuts.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Blog things from Sammy

You Are Cookie Monster
Misunderstood as a primal monster, you're a true hedonist with a huge sweet tooth.
You are usually feeling: Hungry. Cookies are preferred, but you'll eat anything if cookies aren't around.
You are famous for: Your slightly crazy eyes and usual way of speaking
How you life your life: In the moment. "Me want COOKIE!"
The Sesame Street Personality Quiz
You Are Kermit
Hi, ho! Lovable and friendly, you get along well with everyone you know.You're a big thinker, and sometimes you over think life's problems.Don't worry - everyone know's it's not easy being green.Just remember, time's fun when you're having flies!
The Muppet Personality Test
Pepperoni Pizza
Robust and dominant.When you go for something, you go full force.You tend to take control of situations easily.And in return, you get a ton of respect.
Your Deadly Sins
Wrath: 60%
Envy: 20%
Sloth: 20%
Gluttony: 0%
Greed: 0%
Lust: 0%
Pride: 0%
Chance You'll Go to Hell: 14%
You will die, but first you will turn into an evil robot.
How Sinful Are You?
I told my friend Diane G that I was going to rant sometime this week...but it's too damn hot for me to go on a rampage...and it's smelly, too. The OKC Stockyards are near my apartment and I got a whiff of something this morning. One of these mornings when I open my door there's gonna be a cow, a pig, and a goat just standing there smiling at me (isn't that the start of a joke or something?) I have got to get the DingBat fixed by the end of the week...I'm absolutely f***king miserable (Hey Donald and Cheryl -- how'd you like that bit of self censorship? Can you feel the Earth tremble?)

Pictures coming soon...I've just got to do some picking and choosing first...or I could just recycle some old ones...who knows...
...3 months and 2 days until the puck drops...

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Random tidbits...

Is it the 06-07 hockey season yet?!?

Oh honey! Art Linkletter said it best that 'kids say the darndest things.' My nephew Zane told me not to eat baked beans because they make you toot. Little devil. You need to have him tell you a knock-knock joke one of these days.

The idiots next door think they can cover-up their sex sounds by cranking the volume on the TV. It doesn't work you *#$%&+!*&%$# morons!

Is it the 06-07 hockey season yet?!?

Dan, the un-official office hooligan has been going around telling dirty limericks. He dared me to go 'commando' a few weeks ago. I wore a dress to work and he thinks that I actually did it (buying the expensive seamless undies at Lane Bryant is an excellent investment!)

I may have to start a new countdown in the near future...I'm dying to know if it's the 06-07 hockey season yet.

Aunt Julie strikes again...



"Oh, Lord. I do wish someone would take that thing away from her."

Oh honey! You needn't worry about any blackmail with this photo. I know for a fact that your mama and daddy have a pic that you'd consider far worse than this one. Can you say fluffy?!?!?

Just grab your camera and head for the balcony...



About one month ago the tornado sirens started going off downtown. And as every redneck in my complex knows, this is the signal for everyone in my complex to run outside, point at sky and grab your trick knee and say 'Gee whiz Maynard there's a storm a comin!' Unless you're me -- in which case you grab a blanket and pillow, throw them in the entry way (the smallest inside corner of the apartment) then you grab your digital camera, run to the balcony..........and play the waiting game..........leaving the TV on the local ABC channel because they have the best weather coverage.



This is the front edge of a storm front (How gay was that?!? But what else are you supposed to call it?!?) This tornado hit the El Reno area and moved eastbound along I-40 toward downtown OKC (my neck of the woods). I'd run back inside every 10-15 minutes to get an update on the weather...which, of course, was totally stupid because I was standing outside on the balcony watching the events unfold, unleash, whatever.



I took the date/time stamp off my camera, so it's a 'guestimate' that these last few pics were taken between 8:30 and 9:00 p.m. What little sunlight was left was absolutely gorgeous and amazing! I think I'm finished with my black & white phase, and am now fascinated with light.



I printed this one off for 'the mother' and she nearly drove me nuts with all her rotating and 'hmmm' mumbling. Finally I said "Hey Ma! Look at Australia and New Zealand!" How else are you supposed to tell top from bottom?!?



This is the end (thank you Jim Morrison) My batteries died and as I stepped back indoors to switch them, lightning hit a transformer across the street from the complex. I remember my exact words at the time...I'm pretty sure they rhymed with moldy spit. During the light show someone outside starting screaming, so I ran outside half naked (I was actually wearing socks........................................and a T-shirt). My new idiot moron redneck neighbor is out on his patio laughing his head off. Bastard...and to think that I was concerned about someone being hurt...you know sometimes I really do hate people.

Sunday, May 28, 2006

The 'Hamster' goes to st. Louis




I attended my first NHL game (hell yeah) at the Savvis Center on April 15, 2006 (don't ask why I picked tax day). The St. Louis Blues played the Detroit Red Wings. I went with Donald, Sheila, and Crystal (hooray). We were walking to our seats and I stepped inside the arena for a quick pic of warm-ups.




Opening face-off. I think I aged 10 years waiting for this idiot to drop the puck.



It was hard to get a good shot of shift change, so I settled for a timeout instead.



Six Blues, three officials, two Wings, and a very satisfied fan (not in a pear tree -- HA).




Poor guy -- on his way to the sin bin -- you should've stayed in bed pal!

Saturday, May 27, 2006

More from St. Louis...



Children, please don't try this at home...remember this is a trained professional...gee, his mama must be proud.









With nine seconds left in regulation, #40 Henrik Zetterberg scores the game winning goal for the Red Wings. I was yelling and screaming because my team won, but then I started moaning and groaning because my first NHL game didn't go into overtime.

When boredom sets in...



Lights at the Ford Center --- these have shone on Metallica, Godsmack, many French-Canadians, and who could forget Sir Paul!!!

Arena football in OKC



Keeping in mind how close I am to a certain football driven town (suck the fooners -- haha) deep rooted hatred for the sport comes naturally to me --- BUT --- this AF2 stuff is addictive (plus it gives me more chances to see beer guy).

The last pics of the CHL 05-06 season



The Blazers made it to the playoffs and their first round opponent was the Colorado Eagles. My seat neighbor Diane made this sign (incidently her last name is Berger...get it? Ham --- Berger! So sue me for being easily amused!)



Another infamous face-off photo featuring the equally infamous #8 Marty Standish and #82 Jared Dumba.



The celebration after forcing game seven. The Eagles ended up taking the series, but were defeated in round two by the Bossier-Shreveport Mudbugs (I've been told that a mudbug is like a crawfish and NOT a crawdad, which are both some type of giant shrimp -- how's that for an oxymoron?!?)